Don't change the way I am, just because people changed.
I failed to realise that. I used to reply text real fast, to everyone. But I reached a point when not just one, but many people replied me like hours later, or even days later. There are also some who only reply when they need something. Tbh when I first experienced that, it was quite sad. Then again, I understand that they are busy, and they have their own priorities so I do not fault anyone. But it reached a point where I felt like I was ignored. Especially in group chats I became even more sensitive. I started to do the same too like reply slower, ignore text. I allowed the vicious cycle to kick in. I began to lose myself. I became more resentful, more anti-social, more closed up to myself.
And here I am, writing this now in hope that I would grab a hold of myself. Be the me I used to be again. (Of course only retain the good old me) If people were to ignore me, it's alright, and move on.
I remembered in 2019, a person told me that he has never chatted to anyone else other than me, whom reply to text instantly. He felt thankful for that. I really appreciated him for telling me that. Even if we do not chat that frequent anymore, I will always remember this.
Constant among the inconsistent.
I am thankful for the minority which I won't name, that are always there for me. They prompt me when I'm quiet. They check in with me once in awhile. They offer me a helping hand. I know it's a two way thing, like, nobody will know what's up with me if I don't say anything. So I can't expect people to keep asking me if I'm alright. But they did it, without me telling. And I'm thankful for their initiative. Similarly, I do not blame anyone who didn't ask because I didn't share.
Stay true to myself.
Simplicity is bliss. HAHAHAHA my motto of life. But I often complicate things. Where is the happy-go-lucky girl hahahaha. Nevertheless, please be nicer to yourself. And yah I know this era who uses blogspot LOL IDC
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